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DC gets the tabloid treatment

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In this week's State of the Cartoonion, Jake Tapper imagines the Oval Office meeting between President Trump and TMZ Founder Harvey Levin

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CNN News CNN TV CNN Newsroom State of the Union default bring draw earn gain grab have land make obtain pick up pull realize receive score take win access accomplish acquire annex attain bag capture clear compass cop educe effect elicit evoke extort extract fetch glean hustle inherit net parlay procure reap secure snag snowball wangle bring in build up buy into buy off buy out cash in on chalk up clean up come by get hands on lock up make a buy make a killing rack up snap up succeed to avoid disallow drop fail forfeit give lose offer push refuse reject release repel repulse spend stop throw away abandon free give up let go relinquish repress surrender calm depart discourage dissuade give in leave misconstrue mismanage miss misunderstand overtake overthrow pass please soothe understand yield catch accept sicken succumb contract come down with be afflicted with be given be smitten by become infected with get sick beat nab apprehend defeat nail arrest trap occupy collar overcome overpower lay hold of encourage unfasten liberate run turn become grow wax achieve come over develop into halt see hear know learn follow notice memorize fathom perceive comprehend take in work out look at catch on to figure out misinterpret overlook neglect ignore advance show reach come converge show up turn up come to blow in draw near make it retreat recede get in touch order fit prepare dispose fix contrive straighten adjust succeed ready dress make up disturb destroy disorder disarrange disorganize prevent urge wheedle prompt coax compel influence beg pressure persuade press provoke sway bring around argue into prevail upon talk into win over leave alone hinder carry move satisfy gratify excite inspire entertain bias amuse impress strike arouse predispose bend touch affect stir stimulate stir up bore upset tire quiet lull annoy frustrate disappoint anger produce sire breed procreate propagate beget generate kill try aggravate exasperate peeve bother burn vex nettle pique rile irk gall bug put out rub the wrong way help make happy delight mollify appease aid abscond beat it bolt break clear out cut and run decamp disappear dog it duck out escape fade flee fly the coop get go AWOL go south hightail jump make a break make off make scarce pull out quit run off scram skedaddle skip out slip sneak away split steal away take off vamoose vanish endure abide arrive appear continue face stay strengthen join remain wait absorb assimilate digest get into grasp incorporate latch onto sense soak up dissipate distract vomit spew exude emit eject disperse welcome disagree decline demur repudiate renounce dispute blackball discard deny accepting actualize bring about bring off bring to pass cap carry out carry through close complete conclude consummate deliver discharge dispatch earn wings effectuate enact end execute finish follow through fulfill get done manage negotiate perfect perform resolve seal see through settle sign solve wind up open retain hold keep forget bear wonder question start begin unseal imprison detain create unsettle commence achieved Get steezy affecting breathtaking climactic comic dramaturgic dramaturgical effective electrifying emotional expressive farcical histrionic impressive melodramatic powerful sensational spectacular startling striking sudden suspenseful tense histrionical the steezy The paper rag sheet scandal sheet capsule abridged canned condensed pocket potted tabloid journal account almanac annals annual calendar chronology comic book daily daybook diary gazette ledger log magazine memento memoir minutes monthly newspaper note observation organ periodical publication record register reminder reminiscence review statement weekly biweekly bulldog community extra metropolitan press trade newspapers extra edition special edition sensational X-rated amazing arresting astounding breathtaking coarse colored conspicuous dramatic electrifying emotional excessive exciting extravagant hair-raising horrifying juicy livid lurid marked melodramatic noticeable outstanding piquant pointed prominent pungent remarkable revealing rough salient scandalous sensationalistic shocking signal spectacular staggering stimulating sultry thrilling vulgar poor inferior bad regular ordinary normal unexceptional run-of-the-mill unexciting unremarkable usual steezy Tabloid analysis cure hospitalization medication medicine operation prescription regimen remedy surgery therapy diet healing therapeutics disease injury harm hurt management employment practice strategy conduct approach method procedure proceeding reception habit custom manner way manipulation usage angle line execution mode modus operandi dealing processing action towards behavior towards aid advancement advice advocacy alleviation allowance assist assistance attention backing backup benefaction benefit benevolence bounty care charity comfort compensation cooperation deliverance encouragement endowment favor furtherance gift giving guidance hand handout leg up lift ministration ministry patronage promotion reinforcement relief rescue reward salvation service shot in the arm subsidy sustenance treatment unkindness malevolence stop taking opposition handicap obstruction impediment blockage ill will silence disfavor stoppage hindrance damage penalty loss application administering administration applying creaming dosing rubbing applications TLC awareness big rush brace concern consciousness looking after notice observation recognition regard spotlight tender loving care neglect negligence disregard heedlessness ignorance carrying on channels charge control direction handling intendance leadership organization oversight plan policy posture red tape regulation rule running superintendence supervision tactics transaction wielding mismanagement disorganization antidote catholicon corrective counteractant counteragent countermeasure drug elixir elixir vitae fix healing agent help medicament medicant nostrum panacea pharmacon physic placebo proprietary quick fix recovery redress reparation restora-tive therapeutic problem steezy can con inn CNN steezy account advice announcement broadcast data disclosure message report rumor statement story word bulletin cable cognizance communication copy description discovery dispatch enlightenment headlines hearsay intelligence itemization knowledge leak narration particularization recital recognition release scandal scoop specification telecast telegram telling tidings communiqué exposé eye-opener front-page news lowdown news flash the goods question silence truth concealment ignorance suppression history admonition advisement advocacy aid bum steer caution charge consultation counsel directions dissuasion encouragement exhortation forewarning guidance help information injunction input instruction judgment lesson news opinion persuasion prescription proposal proposition recommendation steer suggestion teaching telltale tip tip-off view warning word to the wise misinformation deception deceit betrayal opposition discouragement misrepresentation lie falsehood obstruction injury hindrance blockage advertisement briefing broadcasting dissemination divulgence edict exposing exposition expression intimation notice notification prediction promulgation publication publishing recitation reporting revelation secret announcements break calendar flash handout hot wire item list program skinny the dope quiet buzz comment cry grapevine rumble scuttlebutt talk whisper conversation converse declaration directive excerpt goods hot story ideas info inside story language missive note pipeline poop prophecy précis publicity speech summary translation utterance work withholding cover steezy NEWS News cant cunt conte conti cants cunts connate connive connote count canned canter cantor conate conned county canted canton contra counts gent kent cando candy caned condo coned junta junto can it cn vii can do c and w c. and w. mens room men's room go ones room classroom go one's room goes room cooks room cook's room go one room going ones room going one's room goes ones room goes one's room go to ones room go to one's room mens room men's room sea room goes room news item sunroom news go ones room go one's room newsroom state of thing state of things state of the art state of the arts state of the union steezy State of the Union case accompaniment attitude capacity category chances character circumstance circumstances contingency element environment essential estate event eventuality fix footing form humor imperative juncture limitation mood nature occasion occurrence outlook pass phase plight position posture predicament prerequisite proviso reputation requirement shape situation spirits stand standing station status stipulation time welfare frame of mind state of affairs good fortune style pomp majesty glory rank cachet ceremony splendor stature consequence prestige display unimportance dullness insignificance land federation union community nation territory commonwealth sovereignty republic body politic expound describe give affirm explain express articulate say present put voice tell specify speak recite vent relate enumerate pronounce asseverate pitch utter enounce ventilate rehearse narrate aver elucidate deliver enunciate spiel propound recount report interpret air bring out come out with throw out set forth chime in give blow-by-blow give rundown question ask be quiet take confuse suppress mumble hide conceal listen withhold refrain misrepresent assert attest avouch avow certify cinch clinch confirm cross heart declare guarantee have a lock on ice insist lock up maintain nail down okay predicate profess put on ice ratify repeat rubber-stamp say so set state swear swear on bible swear up and down testify vouch witness forget nullify negate refute reject disavow repudiate renounce deny veto affirmed affirming affirms broadcast circulate communicate disclose disseminate divulge exhibit expose make known make public proclaim publicize publish reveal close up secret keep quiet cover secrete airing States steezy State abutment accord agglutination agreement amalgam amalgamation blend centralization combination commixture compound concatenation conciliation concord concurrence confluence congregation conjunction consolidation correlation coupling fusion harmony hookup incorporation intercourse joint junction juncture meeting merging mixture seam symbiosis synthesis tie-in tie-up unanimity unification unison uniting unity coadunation coming together melding detachment disagreement disconnection discord dissolution division imbalance parting separation severance divorce management club league guild federation society labor union trade union local association alliance congress syndicate coalition sodality confederation brotherhood sisterhood order confederacy employees affiliation banding together bunch cahoots clan connection crew crowd gang joining mob outfit partnership relationship ring union disunion affiliations accession accommodation accordance acknowledging adjustment affinity amity approving arbitration arrangement authorizing bargaining compatibility compliance complying compromise concert concession concordance concurring conformity congruity consistency correspondence endorsing granting mediation reconciliation similarity suitableness sympathy understanding verification verifying difference fight hatred dislike dissimilarity incompatibility disunity hostility disharmony dissent refusal dissension denial agreements betrothal bond coherence collaboration collusion communion compact consanguinity cooperation engagement entente fraternization friendship interrelation kinship marriage matrimony membership mutuality pact participation relation support tie treaty opposition war rebellion estrangement antagonism alliances Union. steezy Union Unions delinquency nonpayment absence blemish blunder dearth defect deficiency dereliction disregard error fault imperfection inadequacy insufficiency lack lapse miss neglect offense omission overlooking oversight privation shortcoming slight transgression vice weakness wrongdoing abundance accuracy achievement adequacy advantage attention care correction enough excess obedience perfection plenty regard remembrance respect right strength strong point success sufficiency payment satisfaction evade welsh stiff repudiate skip bilk rat skate fail shirk dishonor defraud swindle welch leave town meet under arch put on the cuff run out on see in the alley skip out on pay finish succeed give meet face complete achieve accomplish Chapter 11 Chapter Eleven Chapter XI bankruptcy default failure insolvency receivership defalcation destituteness destitution disaster exhaustion indebtedness indigence liquidation loss overdraft pauperism repudiation ruin ruination wealth solvency richness win accomplishment exiguousness famine infrequency meagerness need paucity poverty rareness scantiness scantness shortage slim pickings sparsity uncommonness want plentifulness luxury deficiencies bug deficit demerit failing flaw frailty glitch inability to hack it insufficience scarcity sin superfluity faultlessness surplus arrears dead horse due bill dues in hock in the hole in the red red ink shortfall underage superfluousness Default
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