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Ron Paul Makes Campaign Stop In Whimsical Jalopy

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The Onion comedy satire news Onion News Network ONN War For The White House Ron ron paul Paul compose prepare form produce cause spawn fashion secure frame invent cook shape mold whip parent hatch forge beget effect arrange adjust brew cook up draw on lead to ruin raze deny veto break lose fail kill end crush halt stop start require force drive coerce oblige tamper impress impel press meddle horn in dragoon concuss shotgun ignore demote refuse refute let go tap name elect keep act pass wage fix draft cease idle leave forget equal mix embody divide unmix draw think gauge judge guess receive get pull harvest clear sock obtain rate gain net reap realize hustle take in plant meet head move reach bear attain catch get to stay miss ABCs annal blow by blow bulletin chronicle detail explanation history lowdown make narration narrative play by play recital report run-down score story tab take tale the picture the whole picture version acclimate accommodate accustom alter change come around comply conform familiarize fit get act together get used to grow used to habituate harmonize match modify play the game qualify readjust reconcile remodel revise roll with punches shape up square suit tailor compile connect construct contrive erect fabricate join manufacture model piece together set up unite weld be delivered of breed bring forth create develop engender fructify generate parturitate propagate provide reproduce yield activate actualize break ground break the ice bring about bring to pass commence embark on enter on enter upon establish eventuate found get going give birth to give impulse go ahead go into inaugurate induce initiate instigate institute introduce launch lay foundation for lead make active motivate mount occasion open originate plunge into set about set in motion trigger undertake cast character class description grade quality sort species variety account adapt assemble begin brand ma'ke drive fight push inaction stump lobby barnstorm run contest tour agitate crusade canvass stand for politick electioneer muckrake mend fences contend for mudsling run for action assault attack barrage blitzkreig bloodshed bombing brush campaign carnage clash combat conflict contention encounter engagement fighting fray havoc hostility onset onslaught press ravage scrimmage significant contact skirmish sortie strife struggle war warfare agitation controversy debate disagreement dispute analyze apply argue check check over consult examine inspect investigate review scan scrutinize sift solicit study survey ventilate activity affair attempt baby bag ballgame big idea biggie bit business cause company concern deal deed effort endeavor essay establishment firm flier follow through game happening hazard house move operation outfit performance pet project plan plunge program project proposition purpose pursuit risk scheme speculation stake striving stunt task thing trade try venture work caravan cavalcade crew crowd cruise enterprise entrada excursion exploration explorers fleet jaunt junket mission outing party patrol peregrination picnic posse quest safari squadron swing team travel travellers trek trip undertaking voyage voyagers wayfarers adventure airing beat circuit constitutional course crossing expedition hike itinerary march migration odyssey passage pilgrimage progress promenade ramble range roaming round route sally saunter sojourn stroll tramp transit transmigration traveling traverse vagabondage vagrancy visit wandering wayfaring battle journey Campaign break pause bar block control layoff fence wall freeze cease lull close check finish stay ending plug letup closing cutoff aid start help halt stage rest depot quit end drop stand kill hold stall scrub conclude tarry refrain desist cut out draw up pull up wind up wrap up be over blow off cool it sign off bear avoid arrest stem clog hush seal still fill muzzle fix hinder impede gag choke bottle abet open free abdicate back out bail out bow out chicken out cop out cut loose desert discard discontinue ditch drop out duck dump dust flake out fly the coop give up the ship kiss goodbye leave leg it let go opt out pull out run out on screw ship out stop storm out surrender take a powder take a walk throw over vacate walk out on wash hands of withdraw yield anticipate bide expect linger remain sojourn stick around wait abjure abnegate constrain curb decline deny oneself do without eschew evade fast fence-sit forbear forgo give the go by give up go on the wagon keep from pass pass up refuse renounce shun sit on one's hands sit on the fence sit out spurn starve take the cure take the pledge withhold baffle beat circumvent counteract cramp cramp one's style dash defeat disappoint disconcert foil forestall frustrate obstruct prevent ruin throw a curve throw monkey wrench in upset the apple cart barricade blank wall deterrent encumbrance hindrance hurdle impediment obstacle obstruction pale rail railing restraint road block snag stumbling block traverse ban boycott condemn debar deny disallow discountenance discourage eliminate enjoin except exclude exile forbid freeze out interdict interfere keep out limit ostracize outlaw override preclude reject restrain rule out segregate shut out suspend abandon abide abstain balk S.T.O.P. funny droll weird odd chancy dicey flaky kinky quaint queer usual sad animated blithe bouncy cheerful cheery effervescent elastic fanciful flippant frolicsome gay graceful happy high-spirited jaunty light light-hearted merry nonchalant resilient sprightly volatile whimsical any way the wind blows arbitrary blowing hot and cold careless changeful contrary crotchety erratic every which way fickle fitful flighty freakish gaga helter-skelter humorsome impulsive inconstant lubricious mercurial moody mutable notional picky punchy quirky temperamental ticklish unpredictable unreasonable unstable up and down vagarious variable wayward yo-yo capricious contingent fluctuant fluky hazardous iffy incalculable precarious problematic problematical rocky speculative touchy tricky uncertain unsound agitated commutative convertible fluctuating fluid indecisive irregular irresolute irresponsible kaleidoscopic mobile movable permutable protean restless reversible revocable shifting skittish spasmodic transformable transitional unreliable unsettled unsteady vacillating vagrant variant varying versatile wavering Mickey Mouse absurd batty boffo camp comical crazy dippy diverting dizzy entertaining facetious farcical fool foolheaded for grins freaky gelastic goofus goofy gump horse's tail humorous ironic jerky jocular joking joshing laughable loony ludicrous nutty off the wall priceless ridiculous risible schtick screwy side-splitting silly wacky waggish witty dangerous difficult airy changeable comic Whimsical heap wreck junker clunker auto bucket of bolts bug buggy bus compact convertible crate four-wheeler gas guzzler go-cart hardtop hatchback jalopy lemon limousine motor car oil burner passenger car pickup truck ride sedan sports car station wagon subcompact taxi transportation truck tub van wheels automobile bucket conveyance coupe jeep machine motor motorcar pickup roadster touring car wagon agent bicycle boat cab car carrier chariot mechanism motorcycle transport vector collapse crash debacle debris derelict destruction devastation disruption fender bender hulk junk litter mess pile-up rear-ender relic ruin ruins shipwreck smashup total waste wreckage cheap car rattletrap vehicle tin lizzie Jalopy The Onion The Onions comic sudden tense affecting breathtaking climactic dramaturgic dramaturgical effective electrifying emotional expressive farcical histrionic impressive melodramatic powerful sensational spectacular startling striking suspenseful the histrionical The onion Onion ONION onions fun humor satire farce picnic takeoff drollery hoopla travesty hilarity ball camp jesting joking sitcom laughs funnies grins schtick chaffing gag show play on send-up sadness tragedy Broadway boards climax comedy dramatic art dramatization dramaturgy footlights histrionic art melodrama play production scene show show business showmanship stage show stagecraft tear-jerker theater theatricals thespian art vehicle crisis dramatics emotion excitement histrionics spectacle tension theatrics absurdity broad comedy buffoonery burlesque caricature high camp horseplay interlude joke low camp mock mockery parody pratfall comedy ridiculousness sham skit slapstick curtain-raiser drama entertainment flop hit mask musical one-act opera performance potboiler smash smash hit theatrical turkey act appearance carnival cinema film flick motion picture movie pageant picture presentation showing curiosity demonstration display event exposition extravaganza marvel parade phenomenon representation sight spectacular tableau view wonder Comedy irony skit wit spoof squib seriousness burly caricature farce lampoon lampoonery mock mockery parody pastiche peep show revue satire send-up strip takeoff travesty vaudeville burlesque cartoon distortion imitation libel mimicry pasquinade put-on ridicule sham animation comic strip drawing representation sketch ball camp chaffing comic drama comicality comicalness drollery drollness facetiousness field day fun fun and games funnies funniness gag show grins high camp high time hilarity hoopla humor humorousness interlude jesting joking laughs light entertainment merry-go-round picnic play on schtick sitcom slapstick wisecracking witticism wittiness Bronx cheer backhanded compliment brickbat butt comeback contempt contumely crack dig disdain disparagement dump jab jest joke laughingstock laughter object of ridicule parting shot pilgarlic put-down raillery scoffing scorn slam slap sneering adumbration allegory alliteration allusion analogue analogy anaphora anticlimax antistrophe antithesis aposiopesis apostrophe asyndeton bathos comparison conceit device echoism ellipsis euphemism euphuism exaggeration expression flourish flower hyperbole image imagery litotes malapropism manner of speaking metaphor metonymy onomatopoeia ornament oxymoron parable paradox parallel personification proteron rhetoric sarcasm simile synecdoche trope tropology turn of phrase understatement way of speaking comedy derision figure of speech Satire story word advice account report message data rumor hearsay telegram tidings dispatch telecast scandal leak telling copy cable recital scoop release bulletin exposé lowdown silence truth history admonition advisement advocacy aid bum steer caution charge consultation counsel directions dissuasion encouragement exhortation forewarning guidance help information injunction input instruction judgment lesson news opinion persuasion prescription proposal proposition recommendation steer suggestion teaching telltale tip tip-off two cents' worth view warning word to the wise advertisement briefing broadcast broadcasting communication communiqué disclosure dissemination divulgence edict exposing exposition expression intimation narration notice notification prediction promulgation publication publishing recitation reporting revelation statement announcement break calendar flash handout hot wire item list news flash program skinny the dope what's going down what's happening comment cry grapevine rumble scuttlebutt talk whisper conversation converse declaration directive excerpt goods hot story ideas info inside story intelligence language missive note pipeline poop prophecy précis publicity speech summary translation utterance work buzz intimate intelligence juicy morsel the lowdown dirt NEWS story word advice account report message data rumor hearsay telegram tidings dispatch telecast scandal leak telling copy cable recital scoop release bulletin exposé lowdown silence truth history admonition advisement advocacy aid bum steer caution charge consultation counsel directions dissuasion encouragement exhortation forewarning guidance help information injunction input instruction judgment lesson news opinion persuasion prescription proposal proposition recommendation steer suggestion teaching telltale tip tip-off two cents' worth view warning word to the wise advertisement briefing broadcast broadcasting communication communiqué disclosure dissemination divulgence edict exposing exposition expression intimation narration notice notification prediction promulgation publication publishing recitation reporting revelation statement announcement break calendar flash handout hot wire item list news flash program skinny the dope what's going down what's happening comment cry grapevine rumble scuttlebutt talk whisper conversation converse declaration directive excerpt goods hot story ideas info inside story intelligence language missive note pipeline poop prophecy précis publicity speech summary translation utterance work buzz intimate intelligence juicy morsel the lowdown dirt NEWS web chain system grid net nexus plexus wattle fabric complex maze fiber mesh artery weave grill hookup jungle netting wiring tracks disorganization mingle meet hobnob avoid divide admix alloy ally coalesce combine come together compound consolidate fuse hook up with incorporate integrate interface intermix join together meld merge network pool team up tie in tie up unite bureaucracy chain of command hierarchy setup structure band binding connection cord fastening fetter gunk handcuff irons ligature link linkage manacle rope shackle stickum tie tie-in wire affiliation affinity attachment connective friendship interrelationship liaison marriage obligation relationship restraint union gossamer labyrinth snare tissue toil webbing amalgamate associate bind blend bond bracket bunch up coadjute commingle conjoin cooperate couple dub get together glue oneself to hitch on hook on join league marry mix plug into put together relate slap on stand in with synthesize tack on tag on team up with throw in together tie up with unify wed apparatus cobweb Network Net-Work Onns warfare combat fighting strife strike struggle battle conflict enmity contest cold war accord truce peace differ contend shoot shell attempt clash challenge disagree bombard attack murder kill meet endeavor strive oppugn tug take on go to war make war wage war aid laze agree action assault barrage blitzkreig bloodshed bombing brush campaign carnage contention crusade encounter engagement fray havoc hostility onset onslaught press ravage scrimmage significant contact skirmish sortie war agitate argue clamor dispute feud wrestle bang heads brawl buck cross swords fret gall grapple grate mix it up quarrel raise Cain row try wrangle affray battle royal brush-off fight flap jackpot mix-up run-in service shoot-out cope cross swords with defy do battle with duel engage go up against oppose put up a fight repel resist shoot it out traverse withstand collision competition emulation fracas rivalry set-to striving tug-of-war War being now since after during pro toward to go to as long as cause considering for for the reason that inasmuch as seeing that whereas as a result of as things go by cause of by reason of by virtue of due to for the sake of in as much as in behalf of in that in the interest of in view of now that on the grounds that over owing to seeing thanks to through backing in agreement on the side of supporting all in all all things considered because everything being equal forasmuch as in consideration of in light of insomuch as pending taking into account accept advocate appreciate approbate approve back be in favor of be on one's side buck for champion choose commend cotton to countenance encourage endorse esteem eulogize fancy flash on go for hold with honor incline lean toward look up to opt for patronize pick praise prize regard highly root for sanction single out support take a liking to take a shine to take to think well of tilt toward value accordingly and so consequently ergo for this reason hence in consequence in that event on account of on the grounds then thence therefrom thereupon thus to that end whence wherefore behind favor therefore FOR fro fork form four fuck off fuck yourself go away leave me alone get lost forc fors forq pasty wan ivory fair light clear ashen hoary milky snowy waxen dark dim black dirty anemic blanched cadaverous colorless ghastly gray leaden pale pallid sallow white bare barren clean empty fresh new plain spotless uncompleted unfilled unmarked untouched unused vacant vacuous virgin virginal void apple-pie order blank bright cleansed delicate dirtless elegant faultless flawless graceful hygienic immaculate laundered neat neat as a button neat as a pin orderly pure sanitary shining simple sparkling speckless spic and span squeaky stainless taintless tidy trim unblemished unpolluted unsmudged unsoiled unspotted unstained unsullied untarnished vanilla washed well-kept achromatic achromic ashy bleached doughy drab dull faded flat livid lurid neutral sickly uncolored washed out corpselike dead deadened deathful deathlike deathly argent blond blonde chalky creamy fair-haired fair-skinned flaxen-haired pale-faced pearly silvery tow-haired tow-headed whitish deadly White whites box shack mansion home dump edifice crib coop layout cave pad abode flat lean-to joint pigpen setup shanty roof kennel den turf castle rack condo pigsty co-op roost digs bullpen office clan tribe race kin folks line folk stock firm outfit parliament council congress commons address apartment base casa crash pad domicile dwelling flop habitat haunt headquarters hearth hole homestead house lodging quarters residence sanctuary seat board contain entertain furnish harbor hold put up quarter receive rent shelter supply take in welcome boardinghouse hotel housing motel room and board rooming house rooms ZIP code box number direction living quarters location number place of business place of residence street whereabouts accept be big on bless buy concede enter give access give the nod give thumbs up grant initiate introduce let let in lodge okay permit sign sign off on suffer take ancestor antecedent antecessor blood breed breeding derivation descent extraction forebear forefather foregoer foremother forerunner genealogy heritage kindred lineage origin parentage pedigree precursor primogenitor progenitor source accommodate accommodations admit ancestry House
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